What I think about the NFL right now.

Hi, gang -- I've taken a week off to think.
First, let me be honest.  I don't really watch football. I've always thought it was more fun to watch with other people and frankly -- as a single 50-something -- if I'm going to be with other people, I want to do something more fun -- like talk to them.

But because of all the NFL player relationship revelations over the past weeks, I've spent a lot of time thinking about it.  Of course, I'm shocked and appalled that grown men are wielding their considerable strength against people they should love and protect.  And it sickens me to watch it, to see the photos, to hear more and more of it coming out.

Adrian Peterson says that he is not a child abuser, but the photos of his son with switch marks covering his legs tell a different story.  You can see them here:  http://dailysnark.com/pictures-adrian-petersons-sons-beating-wounds-emerge/  And supposedly Peterson has a history of child abuse with a previous case.

This is totally unacceptable.

Heroes need to be heroes.  Good men everywhere need to condemn this activity. Good companies need to quit advertising.

My dilemma has been about the role of a boss in this stuff. Obviously, if one of my employees  admitted to abusing a child, I'd fire their ass.  It is part of our mission, thus I cannot have an employee doing exactly what we are trying to eradicate. But, is a hitting a child with a switch or hitting your girlfriend in an elevator (with no legal conviction, yet) affecting that person's job performance?

I put this question to a room full of smart, smart people yesterday -- the board members of Community Partners of Dallas.  And their answer?  A resounding YES.  The men and women in our board room talked about character, heroism, morality.  We talked about advertisers leaving the NFL and about politics.  About rushing to judgement and about women standing up and leaving football because they are not going to support an organization that makes these men into role models. And about how pro-business conservatives need to feel the same way because what is more pro-business than letting employers fire who they want.

And don't get me started on why the NFL is a non-profit organization.  It's time for that nonsense to end too.

It's not an issue that seems to be going away anytime soon. I'm glad we're all talking about it because evil cannot live in the light.

Let's bring in the sun and stop it for good.

Talking Success: 3 Tips for Serving on a Non-Profit Board

Sometimes my weekly blog post gets away from me.  This week, I have many excuses -- super full days of meetings (even went down to Austin for lunch, then back in one day) and night-time stuff too (hosted a party for 100+ teens last night), so the blog just had to go on Wednesday and then again on Thursday and it almost went today -- BUT no, I'm writing it because this is the post the world needs -- at least in my tiny mind, anyway!

NOTE:  Last night was the last time I'll ever throw a high school party, as the youngest niece of my only brother is graduating from high school in May.  My mom and I hosted Lina and her friends with a #ThrowbackThursday skate party at White Rock Skate Center and we hired the In-N-Out Burger Truck to come and do burgers for them.  It was a huge success, and once again I was reminded that those kids at HPHS really are great kids.  This is Lina with me before the throngs arrived -- about the only time I saw her all night...

Now back to what the world needs -- tips for success for serving on a non-profit board!

I have been the CEO for a non-profit agency for more than 15 years, so I know what I'm talking about -- of course, ask the board members at Community Partners of Dallas or Wipe Out Kids' Cancer if you don't believe me -- and if you do ask them, be sure and tell me what they said -- I'm nosy that way.  And speaking of talking, this brings me to my Talking Success Tips:

1. Talk to the CEO/ED.  As a board member you are supposed to be there for counsel and advice -- so give it.  Your experience could bring a fresh approach to a problem the non-profit is facing.  I can't tell you what a blessing it is to receive a call or an email from one of our board members (we have 25 over here at CPD).  Just a "Hello, how's it going over there?" is wonderful and often gets my brain switched on in a new way.
2. Tell them you need to resign.  It's been said before and will be said again, but if you cannot attend the board meetings and events, resign immediately.  The non-profit needs someone who can show up and give everything -- their time, talent, and treasure.  You are doing the charity a real disservice by holding on.  And believe me -- EVERYONE knows that you are the slacker.  Get off and give someone else a chance to provide new resources.
3. Tell your friends (and strangers) why you care about your charity.  Most people want something to talk to you about.  Mention that you're on the board of such-and-such agency and just wait -- they'll ask you about it, and even if that person doesn't, the next one will.  Some of our best donors at CPD have come to us because a board member told them about the agency.

What are your tips?

The Post-It That Kills Me

We have our board meeting today at Community Partners of Dallas.  The members will be here in 30 minutes.

I love our board meetings.

I know that these may not be words you hear much, but I really do.

Our board members are great -- I consider many of them my friends -- and all of them are passionate about our kids. 

I have 4 post it notes at all times stuck to the bottom of my computer here at CPD:

1. My server and email passwords (super-secure over here, aren't I)
2. A question to ask people when we talk about CPD that says "What are your impressions of ____?"
3. A copy of Philippians 4:6 that says "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

I update the 4th post-it each year.  I did this today and it now says this:

Do you know what this is?

It is the number of child deaths due to child abuse and neglect last year.

So, why don't you answer question 2 for me concerning that news? 

Our board members at CPD are wrestling with it. 

Me too.

Sex in the Board Room

I feel certain that you have all been on pins and needles wondering when this post would be written since I closed my Secret #4 post with this line:

Next time, let's talk about sex.

Well, it's next time and let's talk about sex -- the sex of our non-profit board members!

NOTE:  Of course, I really mean their gender.  I have no idea about the sex lives of our board members at CPD.  At least I have no ideas that I'm willing to tell you about.  Ha!

As an agency that helps abused and neglected children, Community Partners of Dallas has always appealed to women more than to men.  Now, this may be because all of our staff are women and we know lots of women, but no matter the reason, this is the truth.

Not that I mean to imply that men do not care about abused and neglected kids -- they do -- we have great volunteers and donors and board members who are men.  But most of our supporters are women.  Our current board is 66% female.  And I like it that way because women participate.

Here is a recent example (that may get me in trouble):

As you know (if you are reading this series), I send out the email board packet about a week in advance of each board meeting (Of course all board members were given the dates of all meetings at the beginning of the year and I continue to remind them when meetings are coming just in case they need reminders...) and in that email I ask them to hit reply to let me know whether or not they are attending the meeting (so we can order the right amount of food).  The words "Don't forget to rsvp for the meeting" are in the subject line of the email.  An ask for their rsvp is in the body of the email (with a reminder why we need this).  The P.S. (in red) again reminds them to rsvp.

So, how many individual emails did I have to send out after the rsvp deadline to those who had not responded?  8.  How many of these were to men? 7.

Now, is this a reason to be removed from the BOD?  Not at all!

Am I being hard on the men?  Maybe.

Non-Profit Management Secret #5...

Women rule.

P.S.  Yes, I know that I get paid to contact board members about attending meetings and this is me just complaining.  But women still rule.

What Size is Your Plate?

And now, the continuation of my Secrets of Non-Profit Management Series...

NOTE:  I wrote this because they always use those words at the beginning of each episode of Hell's Kitchen.  You can take me away from the TV, but the TV references just keep coming!

Are you a volunteer on a non-profit board?  If so, thank you!  There are lots of people who aren't. 

One of my friends (who was in the midst of being the PTA President at a local school) explained it to me this way when I asked her how it was going with volunteer recruitment...

A lot of people have told me that they just have too much on their plate to help.  The real truth is that they have a different sized plate -- some people must think their plate is a saucer, others think their plate is a dinner plate, and others obviously have a platter!

Secret #4 is

Know Your Plate Size Before You Join That Board



Ask the Board Chair or the CEO what will be required of you as a serving board member -- then decide if you have the time and energy to devote to the cause.

At Community Partners of Dallas, we run our board structure kind of like the Junior League of Dallas (Hey -- they trained me and thousands of other women who are changing Dallas -- if you are eligible, join the JLD today!), so while all board members are asked to attend our 4 board meetings and their task force meetings, only 6 of these 26 board members serve on the executive committee as officers, thus attend more meetings.  Know what you can manage and still be successful.

And ponder this:  Are you serving or sitting on that board?  Often the terms are used interchangeably, but they mean totally different things!

Know that before you say yes too!

Next time, let's talk about sex.

Tips for Sending a Great Board Packet to Your Trustees

My Secrets to Non-Profit Management Series is off and running, so for Secret #3, I thought I'd talk a little about every ED/CEO's periodic hell -- the Board of Director's Meeting Packet.

Do your board members feel like this guy in the photo?

Why is sending out a board packet so hellish?

Yes, it's a pain to gather all the info together, but the real hellish part is that I never know if the board members actually read it.  Of course, the reason I know this is because I serve on boards and I know that sometimes even the best board members don't crack open that document...

NOTE:  I admit nothing regarding any current or previous board upon which I may or may not have served regarding reading or not reading the blasted thing.

So, all kidding aside, how do we make the packet compelling?

Secret #3:

Shorten That Packet -- Your Board Meeting Packet Needs Just Enough (But Not Too Much) Info

In the old days (this means last century), the trend was to over-burden your board members with information -- truly, I used to mail out packets (thank GOD for email -- oh, the trees that met their maker in the name of non-profits) that were 3 or 4 inches thick -- including detailed reports from every staff person, multiple letters from donors, data sheets filled with jargon that they couldn't possibly understand, and more.

Don't do this, people!  Over time (and with help from past board members who actually read the things), I have gotten it down to this list:

• Meeting Agenda
• CEO report (Staff turns in their reports to me and I add and subtract and make it all into a few pages of fun and interesting -- yes, I'm the sole judge of that -- information.  I can discuss this further in another post, if anyone is interested -- just let me know.)
• Minutes from the last board meeting and executive committee meeting
• Current agency financials

Of course, sometimes additional things are included such as the annual report, the proposed agency annual budget, etc., but basically, this is all you need to send.

Email it to them about a week in advance.

Hope this helps you whittle away -- you'll be glad you did! 

More Secrets to come...

Non-Profit Management Secrets Revealed!

I recently asked our board members to be honest with me, then I asked them this question (stolen from Seth Godin):

When people talk about Community Partners of Dallas, what do they say?

Scary, huh?

Thankfully, I didn't hear anything bad (of course, maybe the board members were just sparing my feelings -- but they know that I'm tough enough to take it) -- lots of people mentioned our mission and helping abused and neglected children, our events (Chick Lit Luncheon and Change is Good), our auxiliaries (The Partnership, yCPD and THANKs), and our volunteer activities, but the thing that was mentioned over and over was that Community Partners of Dallas was thought to be well-run.

You might imagine that I liked that response since I know that this is a big part of my job as CEO.

So, for the next few weeks, I am going to let you in on all of my non-profit management secrets.  I'm even going to post more than once a week, so get ready.

Secret 1 is...

Do All You Can To Help Other Non-Profits Succeed

With me there really are no secrets and I think most members of the non-profit community feel this way.  I really will help other non-profits with advice to succeed, even though you may think that isn't too smart.

If I help someone to learn how to raise more money, doesn't that mean there's less for CPD?

I don't believe that.  If your cause is compelling and you can tell your story, there are enough generous people in Dallas for both of us.

And I promise that what you put out there will come back to you.  More tomorrow...

The Syndrome No One Talks About But We All Know

We had a board meeting today.  I was dog tired when the board members arrived here today and I'm even more tired now, but now I'm also hopeful.  Let me explain.

Our board members at Community Partners of Dallas are really great.  They care about our kids, they are willing to put messages on their FaceBook pages to promote us, they laugh and they cry with me.

Today at the meeting I told them about how hard this time of year is for the staff and how difficult it is to make all of the speeches, and meetings, and events, and wish pick-ups, and well, just and, and, and...

NOTE:  I know that the AND AND AND Syndrome (My new catch phrase -- use it in a sentence today!) is not just for CPD employees or even just for non-profit employees.  Everyone is busy and stressed in November and December.  We're just like you.

So I started my CEO remarks at the end of the board meeting complaining about the hell that is upon us and then told them about our kids here at CPD -- specifically about a 12 year old boy who was tortured by his parents and was forced to sleep in a dog crate and shot in the feet with a BB gun and was beaten and was spit upon, and more.  And about his 5 year old sister who thought all boys slept in dog crates.  And about the toughest caseworker in the unit who was driven to sobbing uncontrollably. 

All of a sudden, my AND AND AND is nothing.

And when I look into the eyes of our board members and see their resolve to continue their support, I'm hopeful.

Thanks for listening, CPD board members.

5 Secrets to Success at Your Next Annual Review

It's that time of year again -- time for the annual review -- the time I jokingly refer to as "Defending My Life".

NOTE:  I really, really love the movie Defending Your Life with Albert Brooks and Meryl Streep.  If you haven't seen it, you must.

I know that annual reviews vary so much depending on the type of business, it's size, company culture -- hell, even the preferences of the individual bosses doing the reviews; but there are a few secrets that apply across the board. 

1. If your company has a form that you fill out prior to your review, spend some time on it.  Don't wait until the day or night before it is due.  I promise that if you give yourself some extra time to start it, put it away, then go back to it, your documentation will be more complete.
2. Be honest about your accomplishments, but make yourself shine.  Go through your emails, your calendar, everything to trigger your brain to remember all of the great things you did for the agency.
3. Use numbers if you can.  "My redo of the donor database helped the 2012 event raise 15% more money than in 2011."  Most bosses are all about the bottom line.
4. Raises are based upon performance at CPD (and at most businesses I know).  While your boss may sympathize with your need to make more money because your husband was laid off, that is your problem, not the company's.  Don't even mention it.
5. Sleep well the night before and wear something that you love for the review.  My mom loves the expression "fake it until you make it" -- looking and feeling your best can't hurt you and it will help you to shine and be on your toes.

Of course, since I work for a small non-profit agency, those of you in the corporate world may not relate.  I'm sorry.  But don't judge -- as the CEO of a non-profit agency, my "boss" is 28 volunteers -- our board of trustees.  Defending my life can be tough!

P.S.  My #FundraisingFriday gift is going to The Wilkinson Center.  They help put people to work!

Gov Christie Just Missed Our Board Retreat

CPD was open late last night.

We had our every-other-year board member retreat and really had a great turnout.  20 of our 28 members were with us, along with our trainer Helen Holman, and a few of our staff members.  Wendy Krispin did the catering (delish) and we made the board members act like they were a group of volunteers coming in to see the agency for the first time.

We gave them the whole ball of wax – made them stand in the lobby until everyone arrived, fill out and sign the volunteer paperwork, tour and listen to what we call the “spiel” from Vanessa, watch the short video – then put them to work counting a school supply and a sock donation.  Then we ate dinner and the training began.

I think they really enjoyed it and I think it was fun for them to see our staff members doing their “normal” jobs.  And it was certainly fun for me to hear the board members talk about ideas to help us raise more money. 

Can I hear a Woo Hoo from Joanna Clarke, please?

A grand time had by all.

So I got home late last night and turned on the TV – right in the beginning of Chris Christie’s speech at the Republican National Convention.

Governor Christie talked about his late mother and how one of her questions was “Do you want to be loved or do you want to be respected?”  Here’s the transcript from the speech:

And the greatest lesson that mom ever taught me though was this one. She told me there would be times in your life when you have to choose between being loved and being respected.  Now she said to always pick being respected. She told me that love without respect was always fleeting, but that respect could grow into real and lasting love. Now, of course, she was talking about women.

But I have learned over time that it applies just as much to leadership.

I agree. 

When people agree to serve on a non-profit board or to work for a non-profit, people are tempted to try to be “loved” – do and say anything to bring in the money or the volunteers, change the programs to “fit” what donors want, see another charity doing something that’s working and decide that you have to do that too (so you duplicate a program service), etc.

Be respected and the love will come.  It has for CPD.

Tips for Serving on a Non-Profit Board

Happy Independence Day!  In the spirit of all things American, I'm on break today and decided to repost one of my most popular blogs ever -- tips for sitting on a non-profit board of directors.  Volunteering and philanthropy  are such an American phenomenon and we are lucky to live in a country where most of our citizens believe in service.  So, eat a hot dog and stop for a moment to think about what you can do to give back to your community!  Now, the tips:


As you may know, I serve as the President and CEO of Community Partners of Dallas, a medium-sized non-profit agency helping abused and neglected children.  I work with our board members every day to make sure our agency is working to "stop the abuse and start the healing" for kids in Dallas County.  I have also served on many non-profit boards in Dallas County, so here are my quick tips if you are considering board service:

1.  Believe in the mission of the agency.
2.  Make sure that you have the time to serve -- you must attend the board meetings, committee meetings, all the events, etc.
3.  Be ready to support them financially with a personally meaningful gift.
4.  Commit to soliciting funding for the agency from your friends, family members, and colleagues.  If you are not willing to do this, just say no.  
5.  Be willing to participate in leadership if asked.

Prior to joining a board be sure to:

1.  Educate yourself about what is required of board members -- time, talent, treasure requirements.
2.  Take a tour of the agency and meet with the CEO/Executive Director.
3.  Check out the other board members.  
4.  Find out if you like the executive staff.
5.  Make sure that the agency has board insurance.
6.  Look at their most recent tax return and financial documents.

If you are interested in board service, call the agency!  There are many, many agencies that need you. 

The Glimpse & other random musings

Gosh, I feel lucky today.

I have a great job and I work with great people and CPD is run by a great and supportive board of trustees.

Sometimes a glimpse of the alternative is all it takes to realize just how lucky you are.

I got a speeding ticket the other day and it really pissed me off.  It was for going 35 in what is normally a 30 (but had a very small sign saying the limit was 20 because it was in a work zone and fines were doubled and yes, I am going to court), and boy I was pissed.  I was pissed because I really am not a speeder and because (of course) everyone gets pissed when they get a ticket.

The ticket was about all I could think about while I sat in the meeting I was headed to when I got the ticket.  Of course I told everyone within earshot about it.  I was still pissed when I arrived back at the office a couple of hours later.  Came in, sat at my desk and started looking at the mail.  In the mail was a newsletter from another non-profit and I started reading the stories about the people they were helping and saw the glimpse.  At least I have the money to pay the ticket if I have to do so (but I better not – I’m going to court with photos). 

But back to the glimpse.

I know that the glimpse comes to me from God.  He helps me see that my life is good and while I may not have had a Valentine date last night, I have hands and eyes and pots and pans and I can whip up a delicious meal for myself and have a swell time alone watching The Biggest Loser and Dance Moms. 

Gosh, I feel lucky today.  And if you need the glimpse anytime, call me.  The stories of the children and families we serve at CPD can break your heart.

P.S.  I sent a donation to the charity that gave me the glimpse after the ticket.  I am a fundraiser, after all.

Back by Popular Demand: Tips on Choosing a Non-Profit Board

This is my most read and requested blog post ever -- Truly, TENS of you have asked me to repeat it (Ha!), so since this week just keeps getting crazier for me, I'm putting it out again.  Thanks for reading -- Paige

The end of the year always gets me thinking about board service.  It is when our board at Community Partners of Dallas turns over and we begin the dance of saying good-bye to wonderful volunteers and hello to new ones.  I absolutely LOVE it!  CPD has the best board members in town.

As you may know, I serve as the President and CEO of Community Partners of Dallas, a medium-sized non-profit agency helping abused and neglected children.  I work with our board members every day to make sure our agency is working to "stop the abuse and start the healing" for kids in Dallas County.  I have also served on many non-profit boards in Dallas County, so here are my quick tips if you are considering board service:

1.  Believe in the mission of the agency.
2.  Make sure that you have the time to serve -- you must attend the board meetings, committee meetings, all the events, etc.
3.  Be ready to support them financially with a personally meaningful gift.
4.  Commit to soliciting funding for the agency from your friends, family members, and colleagues.  If you are not willing to do this, just say no. 
5.  Be willing to participate in leadership if asked.

Prior to joining a board be sure to:

1.  Educate yourself about what is required of board members -- time, talent, treasure requirements.
2.  Take a tour of the agency and meet with the CEO/Executive Director.
3.  Check out the other board members. 
4.  Find out if you like the executive staff.
5.  Make sure that the agency has board insurance.
6.  Look at their most recent tax return and financial documents.

If you are interested in board service, call the agency!  There are many, many agencies that need you. 

3 Tips for Non-Profit Board Members and CEOs/Executive Directors

Are you a board member for a non-profit agency?

If so, thank you!  You are doing what many people don’t have time to accomplish.  Some of you have been serving for many years, some for a few weeks, but whatever your term of service, we can all use a few tips to improve.  Here are a few tips for board members:

1. Attend board meetings, committee or task force meetings, and events.  Many foundations look at this specifically to see if board members are really involved – or not – and base their funding decisions upon it.  Plus, if you are not attending the agency events and supporting them, you should roll off to allow others to serve.
2. Call your Executive Director every once in awhile.  Take him to lunch.  Ask how the agency is doing.  Ask how you can help her.  You don’t know what a gift it is for me to hear from one of our board members.  Just a phone call often energizes and inspires me to think more strategically or even to just smile and feel good about what I’m doing.  Being a CEO of a non-profit agency can be difficult – your one-on-one support is vital to a healthy relationship.
3. Give.  Give advice, ideas, money (You knew I would say that, didn’t you?  If I didn’t every ED in town would be after me!), and friends.  That is what we need you to do most.  Support us and ask your friends to do the same.  Use your areas of expertise and circles of friends to make that agency better financially and strategically.

Are you an Executive Director/CEO of a non-profit agency?

I’m not letting you off the hook either.  Here are my tips for you:

1. Thank your board members.  Tell them you appreciate them.  Listen to their advice.  If you say that you will do something or look into something – do it – and let them know that you did it.  These are the people who are your eyes and ears in the community.  You need them to talk about your cause at the next cocktail party they attend, at their office, at their place of worship, and at their daughter’s school carnival.
2. While the board members are your collective boss, you cannot allow an individual board member to direct the business of the agency.  A personal agenda from a single board member is not your mandate.  Know your bylaws and use them.
3. Give your board members the tools they need to feel comfortable talking about your agency.  I think sometimes non-profits forget that their board members don’t live and breathe the agency every day.  You need to give them memorable stories of the need you fill.  One of the best things to do is to ask them why they care about your agency.  They may forget the exact number of kids you serve, but they will always remember why they care.

These are short lists, but I hope that they are helpful.  I’d love to hear what you think.

Tips on Keeping a Great Board Engaged

We had a fantastic board meeting today at CPD.  Our full board only meets four times a year, so when we meet as a group, we really try to pack a lot of action into the meeting. 

The board members at Community Partners of Dallas are great.  Some of them have been with us since before I started here (almost 10 years ago), some are serving in the first year of their first term, but the vast majority are somewhere in between.

I think that most of them (If not every single damn one of them!) would tell you that they like serving on our board.  Here are some reasons why:

1. They were provided with the expectations of service prior to joining the board.  This means the time, talent, and treasure requirements.
2. We start our board meetings on time and we end on time. 
3. Every board meeting includes some special reminder of why CPD is here to serve the abused and neglected children of Dallas County.  When a board member hears a story of abuse and neglect directly from a CPS caseworker or sees a great video about reporting child abuse, we are able to remind them why they care.
4. Our staff members really make sure that our board members have everything they need to be successful.  This means that if we are asking them to ask their friends to give to our next event, join our woman’s auxiliary group, etc., they have an email to forward or a letter to sign, stamps, addressed envelopes, even a pen waiting for pickup at the front desk or delivered to their home. 
5. We try to make sure that our board members are thanked and recognized for everything they do for us.  We send personal thank you notes, recognize them at board meetings, etc.
6. Service on our executive committee is considered a true above and beyond gift to the agency.  The board members chosen as officers by their peers know that they are truly needed and feel it is a privilege to serve in this capacity. 
7. Each board member’s special talents are acknowledged and promoted in the best way to serve the agency – we want their advice and we make sure that they know it!

What makes you want to serve and/or keeps you serving on a non-profit board?

Tips for Being a Good Boss

How can you be a Good Boss? 

Often, I think it is easier to explain how to NOT be a Good Boss.  I think that we have all had a gross boss or two in our lives (I know that I have – sit next to me at the next shindig and I’ll tell you all about her/him/it) and I learned as much about being a Good Boss watching them treat people badly as I have watching a Good Boss shine.  And I am not saying that I am the best boss, either.  I have made mistakes and will continue to do so.  But, IMHO, here are a few tips for becoming a Good Boss:

• Be honest.  Most of the time, your staff can take the truth – give it to them.  Tell them why you made the decision you did or why you are not going to be able to hire another person to do such and such.  Everyone sleeps better at night knowing that they were dealt with in an honest manner – including you.
• Seek diversity in opinion.  I believe that the best way to make a decision is to look at all sides.  Your staff can help you to see that your initial decision isn’t always the best decision.  And keep your door open – everyone feels more comfortable knowing they can have your attention pretty much any time.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff.  In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter if Susie Q calls her mom each afternoon?  If she checks facebook a few times?  A little fun in Susie Q’s day makes Suzie Q a happy employee, plus maybe Susie Q can transition into your Social Media Maven for Moms!
• Don’t sweat the small stuff unless it is driving you ab-so-f’n-lutley crazy.  Finally, someone has to tell the people who use the microwave that they have to clean it.  You are the boss, after all.
• Remember that your staff members are not your friends.  I know that this sounds funny coming from me, as those of you who know me know that I consider some of my co-workers my very best friends.  But a wise CPD board member once told me something that I’ll never forget.  She said, “Paige, your staff members don’t think of you as their friend.  You are their boss.”  Even though I absolutely love all of the staff at Community Partners of Dallas and would fight a circle-saw for every single one of them, I must make decisions that are first and foremost for the best of the abused and neglected kids served by our agency.

What are your tips?

I Died 5 Years Ago

About 5 years ago, I was reported as dead.

I wasn’t.

Really, it was just a typo in my church newsletter.  My mom made donations of lilies in honor of my brother, his family, and me during the Easter season.  The newsletter accidentally listed my name under the “in memory” section instead of the “in honor” section. 

Of course, I wasn’t mad or anything.  Things like this do happen occasionally (luckily, not for CPD – Joanna is VERY careful about it).  You laugh and move on.  My family and I all just thought that it was hilarious and of course I spent a lot of time telling the story at work and getting to use Mark Twain’s famous line “reports of my death are greatly exaggerated”, etc.

Now, I go to a big church, Highland Park United Methodist (the largest United Methodist Church in the country, I think), and at that time they only sent a snail mail newsletter to members, so thousands and thousands of people received the notice that I was dead.  And aside from two old friends from high school calling my mom to ask her when I passed, no one much noticed.

What’s up with that, people?  I grew up here.  People know me.  Two people called?

Life truly does go on, doesn’t it?

Make the most of your days here on earth.  Of course, I suggest that you do that by giving back to your community (We are here for you at Community Partners of Dallas!).  Because someday, no matter how famous or popular you are now, you will probably be forgotten.  I just got hit in the face with it a little early.

And remembering this quote by the great Martin Luther King helps to keep me on track:

Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ‘What are you doing for others?’

Make your days here count, because even one small gift can change a life for the better.  Someone you will never meet will benefit from your volunteer service teaching ESL, your donation of funds to provide a winter coat or food, your instruction to your own child about bullying others – the list goes on and on and on.

That’s your legacy.  It will not be forgotten.

Tips on Choosing a Non-Profit Board

The end of the year always gets me thinking about board service.  It is when our board at Community Partners of Dallas turns over and we begin the dance of saying good-bye to wonderful volunteers and hello to new ones.  I absolutely LOVE it!  CPD has the best board members in town.

As you may know, I serve as the President and CEO of Community Partners of Dallas, a medium-sized non-profit agency helping abused and neglected children.  I work with our board members every day to make sure our agency is working to "stop the abuse and start the healing" for kids in Dallas County.  I have also served on many non-profit boards in Dallas County, so here are my quick tips if you are considering board service:

1.  Believe in the mission of the agency.
2.  Make sure that you have the time to serve -- you must attend the board meetings, committee meetings, all the events, etc.
3.  Be ready to support them financially with a personally meaningful gift.
4.  Commit to soliciting funding for the agency from your friends, family members, and colleagues.  If you are not willing to do this, just say no. 
5.  Be willing to participate in leadership if asked.

Prior to joining a board be sure to:

1.  Educate yourself about what is required of board members -- time, talent, treasure requirements.
2.  Take a tour of the agency and meet with the CEO/Executive Director.
3.  Check out the other board members. 
4.  Find out if you like the executive staff.
5.  Make sure that the agency has board insurance.
6.  Look at their most recent tax return and financial documents.

If you are interested in board service, call the agency!  There are many, many agencies that need you.